Our interview with Lauren Brim who is a wellness and female empowerment coach, and the author of two books, “The New Rules of Sex” and “The New American Family.”
Lauren is passionate about helping women discover their sexual wholeness, and the happiness and pleasure that come from questioning what society has taught them and writing their own rules. Along with writing her next book, coaching clients and finishing a Ph.D., Lauren is the proud mother of a two-year-old daughter, who she consciously choose to conceive and co-parent with a longtime platonic friend.
Lauren is former Radio City Rockette turned alternative healthcare practitioner. She began practicing mind-body medicine in 2004 after it helped her heal miraculously from a fractured spine while dancing. Lauren has worked in the healing arts for over a decade and began to specialize in women’s sexual health after training to be a midwife and realizing that no one in health care was talking with women about their sexuality. Through her education and personal experiences, Lauren became very aware that the way women felt about sexuality and their ability to communicate, gather information and negotiate those sexual relationships had a huge effect on their sexual health and happiness. She now works with clients on a variety of challenges relating to sexuality including lack of pleasure, the presence of pain or numbness, body image issues, pregnancy, childbirth, postpartum and reproductive challenges, relationships in all their forms, gynecological health, and of course, mastering sex itself.
While researching and writing “The New Rules of Sex,” a revolutionary 21st-century approach to sexuality, relationships, and love, Lauren began talking with other women about their sexuality and discovered that, contrary to the idea that modern women have sex all figured out, sex is still clouded in ignorance, shame and confusion in abundance. She quickly learned that the root of this problem was that no one was talking about sex, and in keeping it in the dark, there would never be change. The suppression of sexuality was still creating suffering for women, and she became a sexual coach because she wanted to free women from the ongoing oppressive paradigm of sexuality and relationships that still affected so many, and help them discover who they truly were as sexual beings, and enjoy the pleasure and power that was possible in their lives and bodies.
Hi Lauren, please tell us a little about you?
I am a woman on a mission to enlighten the world about human sexuality! I’ve written two books, “The New Rules of Sex” and “The New American Family” and I love helping men and women rewrite the story they have around sexuality through my writing, speaking and coaching. If there’s one thing I could share with every human on the planet it is that their sexuality is important, their pleasure matters, and that there is a way to move through their fear and into new realms of possibility, happiness and ecstasy.
Describe yourself in 3 words?
Ambitious. Caring. Alive.
How did you get started working as a wellness and female empowerment coach?
I got into the business of wellness after literally breaking my back dancing with the Radio City Rockettes in 2004. It forced me to look at the emotions underlying my physical health and that was a huge paradigm shift for me. I started practicing a consciousness based approach to health that later translated to my work with women around their sexuality, relationship and family life. I was frustrated with the outdated, conservative and even suppressive message being given to women about who they could and couldn’t be sexually and in relationship. I wanted to bring a message to women that allowed for a more authentic and fulfilling life.
How has this experience changed your life?
My work isn’t something I do for money, but a way of living and being in the world. I embody what I teach women, and by embody I mean I live, breathe, struggle, succeed, question, overcome, and am always in pursuit of learning more. We are living at a time where great change is possible for those who are willing to take a step into the unknown. For me, that first step meant not only creating my own sexual and relationship paradigm, but discovering that I could consciously create family outside the model of the nuclear family, and this lead to the birth of my daughter almost two and a half years ago.
What is the most rewarding part of your work?
The most rewarding part of my work is when I see sexual shame lift out of someone’s heart and I see them set free to be themselves. It’s one of the most beautiful and rewarding things to witness. I also love hearing women’s stories of discovering pleasure. .
How do you manage your busy work life and a family?
I work smarter, not harder! Working for myself gives me a ton of flexibility, but I also co-parent in raising my daughter which gives me time every day to do fun things with her in the morning, and then sit down to write and work in the afternoon while she’s with her dad. It also gives me nights out every week to play, date, travel, and enjoy the rich cultural playground of Los Angeles.
Now tell us about your book “The New Rules of Sex”? And where we can buy it?
The “New Rules of Sex” is a book that will take you on a journey through your own sexuality and what you think and feel about it. It will reeducate you, challenge you, and ultimately support you in finding your most authentic expression of yourself in your sexual relationships. It’s half-memoir, and rich with juicy intimate stories that will shock and surprise you, and it’s half-research paper, with a year’s worth of research into the history and science of sexuality and relationships. You can buy it on Amazon or Kindle!
What other projects have you been, or hope to be to be part of?
I have a few projects in the works including a new book, a museum of sexuality, a clinic to provide holistic well women’s care to underserved women of color, and I would love to have another baby!
Best advice ever given?
Do what you love.
Is there a Quote or Mantra you live by?
“Somewhere beyond right and wrong, there is a garden. I will meet you there.” – Rumi
Where we can follow you?